In my very first blog, I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR!!!, I stated that when you look good you feel good but, in this blog, I’m going to focus on that feeling that we are all chasing. Its different for everyone. It would be very naive of me to assume that throwing on your favourite t-shirt could be the solution to all your problems. What I meant by that was throwing on your favourite t-shirt helps. It makes you feel slightly better in the midst of whatever struggle you may have at the moment.
That brings me to the topic of self-care. Self-care is something my friends and I joke about when we do selfish things or spend a lot of money on things we really don’t need but it makes us feel good. So, let’s talk about it. I’m not a psychologist or an expert on the workings of the human mind or behaviour. So, I can only refer to my own experiences. I went through a rough patch the past few years. I wasn’t paying attention to myself. I stopped doing the things I loved not on purpose but because I did not have the time or energy for it. I love reading books and magazines but in the five years that I was working I only read 3 books from start to finish. I would buy 3 magazines every month Destiny Man, Men’s Health Magazine and GQ. I stopped buying them this year because for almost a year the books never came out of the plastic packaging I bought them in. I started journaling when I started working because it was an outlet for me and a way for me to express my feelings purely without fear of being judged and I’m not really good at talking about how I feel I usually eat my feelings. At some point I stopped writing in my journal. I used to write poems when I was in high school. I don’t even know where my book of poems is. I loved dressing up for work and by now you should know I love fashion. When I started working I wore a tie and a blazer to work every day. Near to the end I was literally just throwing on anything that was clean. I wasn’t seeing my friends as often as I would like because they live in Cape town and they also lead busy lives.
The saying goes you cannot pour from an empty cup. So, I decided to fill my cup. I quit my job as a teacher to pursue my aspirations of being a writer. That’s why I started this blog. You can say that this blog is a form of self-care for me because it combines so many of the things that I love. I started journaling again. It’s a great way to put my thoughts and feelings into perspective. I love singing and listening to music and for a while the sound of music annoyed me and I stopped singing. I think the first album for 2018 that I listened to was Everything Is Love by The Carters. The joy of singing still hasn’t returned to me. I’ve started reading magazines again so I’m back on track with all the latest trends. I like going out and spending time with my friends. I’m really at my happiest when I’m around them. I went on holiday with my family to Hermanus recently. I LOVE the beach. Its my happy place. The sound of the wind and the crashing of the waves always leaves me with a sense of calm that’s why I enjoyed it so much. At night while I laid in bed I could hear the ocean. I get my hair cut every 2 weeks and I go for mani/pedis once a month and I also indulge in a bit of shopping every now and then.
All these things are material and they aren’t necessities. But without them I became an empty shell. If I look at pictures of myself from a year ago or even a few months ago I can see the sadness in my eyes even though I’m smiling and genuinely enjoying myself in those moments. When I look at recent pictures of myself I can see a difference. You cannot fake happiness and I am truly happy right now. That’s why I started off this blog by saying when you feel good you look good. Now who doesn’t want to look good?
We need to make time for ourselves, take care of ourselves and do the things we love.